Today

another day, from home to school, from school to shopping with a friends, from then back to school, then boom i was running with my sister Emily πŸ™‚ yea haha my friend Emily is more like a sister then a friend, my forever friend/sister πŸ™‚ and her mom, which i gave her a smile when i calle her mom hahaha πŸ˜€

and i saw my best friend smile!! on this very awesome run, we ran in the rain OMG THE RAIN!!!!!!!!!!! i love rain i even danced and got weird stares hahaha but it was fun!!Β 

i love being with them πŸ™‚

hopefully they know how much i care about them πŸ™‚ i hope they care about me too! ❀

Old song new meaning??

Amor te amo – Tierra Cali

old old song used to have a big deep meaning to me, then i lost interest in it, never to listen to it again, and then i started to fall for soemone, to me he is the most special person in the whole world; well for know he is but i know where we stand

he has a girl; i have friends, i guess we are better off just staying friends maybe not who knows

Realization

i cam to realize that my family still think very very low of me!! am just the kid who has fucked up way too much and deserves to be alone, most of the time i will be locked up in my room, or out and about exercising or sketching, listening to music, or thinking

why do i even bother to care? siblings who throw my mistake in my face, family who always talks about how i need to do things better and stop fucking up, my past was the past, like legit, what i did i have already put it behind me, not to relive but to keep as a reminder that i can always change and do things for the better.

me my self and i, is in a very much of a rant mode, but i feel like why rant, music will take this pain away, not a bad pain, a pain of being alone and wanting to cry, but i swore that never again will i let anyone and i mean anyone see me or hear me cry, i will no longer cry for the stupidest reasons, i will keep my head held high and turn the other way until i am not anger anymore.

rant mode is kind of gone know and i am still upset but its for the better, its going to be all AOK!

 

………am sorry siblings or not GO FUCK YOURSELF >.< am a fucking person and your sister!! Dont treat me like shit, and Β dont expect me to do everything you want me to specially cause am “Pissing you off” by walking into the damn room!!! and dont except me not to punch you in the arm when you just fucking hit me with a damn radio wire!! i have fucking marks now thanks alot idiots!!

Gone

Ive been gone from here for a while D:

no bloggs no update i just disappeared!

sad face 😦 sad face:( 

why because ive been in school and ive been busy dealing with stupid people, not by choice but hey i get what i get

.-. my life is a mess again and am going blank idk what to do

like i wanna do and say things change myself for the better but i just cant :/

yesterday

so it rained most of the day yesterday D:

i hate rain but i love it!!

the only reason why i hate and i mean hate rain with a passion is because of the thunder and lightening, i am not sure what it is about those two things but i do hate them, it it was for me the only things from the sky would be rain as in the water!

the reasons i love it is because i think it looks beautiful to see the world in a different view then just hot sun all the time

 

I had a pretty decent day yesterday! had the day mainly to myself until my sister and family showed up

then everyone was getting mad, and yelling and making me feel like complete and utter shit, yes i am not perfect and never do i want to be, but they gotta realize that am going to do me and they will never be able to change that!

The whole you fucked up when you were little was and is a mistake! like come on people!! what i did when i was around 12-14/15 is in the fucking past get over it, i cant change the past,a nd i cant predict what i am going to do in the future but i have to worry about know is the present, ugh but i guess thats whats happens when you fuck up and the whole world just want to throw it in your face

Rainy day??

i wouldn’t say this is a rainy day because there’s almost no rain

like come one if it was poring and everyone was running around or if everyone was stuck at home yes then that’s a rainy day but no this is not, well to me its not!

 

 

smile

Today i actually had a good day!!

A little arguing here and their but i am glad that i decided to go to the beach!

no i didn’t get to swim because it was “too Dirty” but being with family and trying to enjoy the day was actually a good thing…. this coming from me Gasp! its a shocker i rather just stay home and be alone, but i enjoyed my family’s company!